Greatest Movie Ever Sold, The

I have always enjoyed the works of Morgan Spurlock. He seems to balance a lively social awareness with a goofy sense of humor that never falls into the trappings of the heavy-handed, holier-than-thou jeremiads of self-righteousness that plague the messages of many contemporary activists and oh-so-earnest do-gooders of the "save the planet" types. Those who miss the forest of monumentally looming global and cultural atrocities for the trees of pointing out such microcosmic injustices as the diminishing population of the Abbott Booby on Christmas Island or the difficulties of being a transgender in places like Kabul.

Yet, Spurlock has come under a lot of fire for the topics he chooses to highlight. The arguments invariably come down to the perceived obviousness of his targets. In his 2004 documentary Super Size Me, he went after the McDonalds Corporation and, vicariously, the entire fast food industry for essentially selling food products which, if eaten regularly, cause a myriad of health problems and societal ills. His detractors typically chastised his efforts by stating that, of course, if you eat McDonald's everyday you are going to get fat, sick or die- missing the point that this semi-poisonous garbage posing as food has been pushed onto the public (particularly the youth) like cheap crank to a speed freak. The ensuing obesity of the poor, the price influencing of certain commodities, the worker's rights abuses (both agriculturally and in the service industry), and the associated health care costs seem to pass right by these folk.

Nuance and the understanding of correlative issues have never been the strong suits of our nation.

Now, Spurlock is again taking shit for his latest project, The Greatest Movie Ever Sold, for pointing out the nefarious ways that advertising engulfs our every waking moment- specifically when embedded within our filmed entertainments.

Even The Onion, that brilliant satirical skewer of everything hypocritical and base in our culture, took a potshot at Spurlock in "The Tolerability Index" two weeks ago stating, "So far, he's taught us that fast food makes us fat and that advertising is everywhere. What obviousness will he reveal to us next?".

Well, how about that "Tolerability Index" author Amelie Gillette has apparently acquiesced to that ad meme, spending far too much of her fucking time watching mindless loops of vapid pop culture in search of a zinger, rotting her brain to the point that she can no longer distinguish relevant social commentary from the importance of Lady Gaga's toenail hue.

The crux is that Super Size Me was no more about McDonalds' food making you fat than Michael Moore's Sicko was about what a great place Cuba would be to live because the health care is free. Everyone's missing the goddamn point.

I fear that if Upton Sinclair was muckraking in this day and age, he'd be called a whiny hack because everyone knows oil men are greedy misanthropes and slaughterhouses are gross and dangerous. What's your fucking point, Upton? Do you expect me to start taking public transit and stop eating meat? Get real.

The Greatest Movie Ever Sold is more clever and insightful than its derogators claim. So is Spurlock for that matter.

It is telling that when he is consulted by an ad agency in the film to define his "brand" (as a filmmaker, he is selling himself after all) that the firm labels him "mindful and playful". That is pretty much right on for Spurlock. While his message is one from a social conscience, he never gets too bogged down in moralizing at the expense of whimsy and irony.

The film's premise is that Spurlock will try to make a documentary on product placement ("branded entertainment" being the new nomenclature) by financing the entire project within those means. To the tune of around $1.5 million. This leads to a bevy of ethical choices. Will his message be overrun by the very commercialism it seeks to expose? Will the sponsors, needing assurances that their products and name will be shed in a good light, demand final cut approval? Can Spurlock hope to be funny and sly enough given these boundaries to even make this a viewable documentary? Does money intrinsically corrupt art? Have our viewing habits become so inured to advertising that it won't matter? Will Morgan lose his soul (and creative control) in the process?

Can I get a Diet Pepsi and some popcorn? That butter smell from the lobby is killing me and those soda ads before the feature made me so thirsty! And yes I am willing to take out a short term loan for some refreshments.

Spurlock soldiers on, filming the entire process. The movie being the making of the movie. He calls some 600 companies, eventually landing 22 who invest various amounts in the film. POM Wonderful was the big sugar daddy, laying out a cool million for above title marquee rights and the promise that every other beverage seen in the film would be blurred out. Spurlock (and many others in the action) are constantly seen sipping from or holding a POM. There is the uniquely shaped bottle sitting on almost every table, desk, and flat surface in the film. It becomes a beautiful running gag.

Interviews with notables such as Donald Trump, Ralph Nader, Noam Chomsky, Def Jam CEO Antonio Reid, and Rush Hour producer/director Brett Ratner give insight into our money obsessed culture and film industry. Spurlock also spends time with advertising execs and cutting edge industry insiders including a proponent of "neuromarketing" (a ringer for a Nazi two generations too late) who uses what I can only refer to as an ersatz "Ludovico technique" from A Clockwork Orange to measure brain responses to imagery using fear, craving, and sexual stimuli for variables during an MRI. Sort of a Mengele meets McLuhan on Madison Avenue creep out. At least the guy didn't hold a cigarette between his thumb and forefinger or wear an eye patch.

Another eye opener was a short diversion to São Paulo, Brazil, where the city government had placed a ban on all prominently displayed outdoor advertising in the city proper. Stangely enough, there was almost something ghostly about the results. Seeing an urban landscape stripped of vulgar advertising was vaguely similar to catching a glimpse of your hooker without makeup. The cover was always there and tacky, but you accepted it in lieu of the harsh reality of what you had done and the fear of what might lie underneath. If it's any consolation, a few of the people interviewed on the streets of São Paulo seemed to like the change and the selected vistas Spurlock chose to highlight looked pretty. I, for one, never want to see Times Square under the same experiment. Giuliani ridding it of the street preachers, homeless, and porn houses was bad enough. That gaudy shit-hole laid bare would be like a bucket of lye rubbed into your corneas.   

It was also quite fascinating that on the walls of nearly every promotional and advertising firm in Hollywood that Spurlock visited, the essential "face" of the industry gurus, there were posters of the worst movies and cinematic abominations that Hollywood has offered up in the past thirty years- displayed prominently like smiling, Down-Syndrome children at a Special Olympics rally. These assholes are proud of their crimes.   

The investors in this film, however, were wise. I actually wanted to try a bottle of POM after the show. I then discovered it was $5 for 16 ounces and decided on a pint of Harp instead.

That was actually the fun thing. The companies needn't have worried about image issues arising from the film. All the corporate principals were well represented (even likable) and showed above board negotiation practices and business ethics (I wonder what was cut?). It would have perhaps been more engaging to see those who turned Spurlock down or had him escorted from their buildings (he actually phoned McDonalds) but the sponsors- ranging from a shoe company to a chain of stop-n-shop gas stations to Ban deodorant to JetBlue to the Mane 'n Tail shampoo producers (a fun story)- were all along for the ride and, if not in on every joke or irony, seemed good sports and people worthy of my business.

Heck, Simone bought a bottle of Mane 'n Tail the very next day after brunch. I'll resist a bestiality gag here.

So, in the timeworn tradition of Hollywood deal making and its variant schemes to secure funding for a creative vision, Spurlock has shown us that dreams don't have to die as long as one is willing to concede a bit of them (or nearly all) to the almighty dollar. Hmm, maybe that is a little trite?

But to silence the critics, POM Wonderful Presents The Greatest Movie Ever Sold is not simply about the shallowness of Hollywood, we as a culture, or the suffocating prevalence of advertising in every aspect of our lives.

Or is it?

That story next, right after these brief words from our sponsor.

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Comments

[Lance Lyle]

Chip,

You won me over on this one...I'll check it out. I can't wait to hear what Brett Ratner has to say. What, was McG not available?

I did hear that Spurlock's next movie was about how drinking alcohol will get you drunk.

By the way, I'm actually serious about wanting to see the movie (just realized it may appear I was being smart-assed about the whole thing).

Love,

Lance